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3 Ways for Middle-Aged Women to Achieve Good Success



I’m writing this in the wake of infamous women’s handbag and lifestyle brands Kate Spade’s death.  Her life and legacy inspired me.  Brains.  Beauty.  Balls.  She had the moxie to pursue her passion and achieved success on her terms, or so it appeared.

Her departure extends the opportunity for other middle-aged women, like me, to reexamine and redefine success.  Several years ago I had to take an honest look in the mirror.  I had to have a no judgment executive meeting with myself.  That meeting led to this transparent moment.

“If you want something said, as a man; if you want something done, as a woman. “ Margaret Thatcher

I did it! I was earning a comfortable six-figure income. I had the corner office that included a conference table with chairs, three large picture windows overlooking a well-maintained park.  I had support staff and a team of professionals I managed. I was making major decisions and moves.

I was successfully launching my children into young adulthood. I was getting promoted in my area of spiritual practice. The date was set for my ordination in the Christian faith.  From the outside looking in, I had it all. Everything looked great. What more could I possibly want?

Lots more.  I was stuck inside a box and screaming to break free.

Boxed in and hampered by the opinions of others, the fear of failure, imposter syndrome, doubt, and not feeling I was enough.

I had to get outside-the-box of limiting beliefs I created for myself.  I had to get out of my own way to enjoy the FREEDOM to have, to do, and to be who I wanted to be. I uncovered and dealt with my limiting beliefs to start my business, get ordained, write a few books, speak professionally, and become a coach.

But I wasn’t always so clear on how to achieve the life I wanted. Following are the three steps I took to achieve success and I help other middle-aged women do the same:


  1. Believe in my valued self. I had to remind myself of the total value that I bring to the table.    Experience. Knowledge.  Skills.  Abilities. Strengths and weaknesses.


  1. Create my revised story. I stopped telling myself to keep me from starting my business, getting ordained, writing books, speaking professionally, etc.  Instead of seeing my middle-age as a curse, I revised my story-narrative.  My middle-age is a blessing because it facilitates the value I bring to the table!


  1. Manifest my unique S.H.I.N.E.TM Anytime I fell the self-limiting beliefs creeping up into my mind and my soul I encourage myself to ‘S.H.I.N.E.’  ‘S.H.I.N.E.’ is an acronym I created to remind me of steps 1 and 2 and to show up, honestly, intentionally, no excuses.


It’s never too late to live the life you want.  It’s never too late to reevaluate what success means, looks and feels like for you.  I leave you my middle-aged com-padres with these three thought-provoking questions:


  1. Self – what value do you bring to the table?
  2. Story – how may you need to revise your narrative?

S.H.I.N.E. – how are you showing up, honestly, intentionally, no excuses?

Dr. Lisa Lewis Ellis, “The Belief System (B.S.) Boss”, because belief systems require S.H.I.F.T. to S.E.R.V.E. You! Learn more at www.lisalewisellis or or 833-542-2697

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